Most of my life I have been told how smart and pretty I am, but that hasn't done me any good. Men do not usually come near me and the ones that do, I chase away. I realize that this is probably a reaction to not being raised around men, but I'll be 30 this year and I'm afraid I'll wind up all alone.

I would really appreciate if you could just give me one step to getting over my fear of flirting.


Sarah

You ask me to give you " just one step to getting over my fear of flirting". The one "step" for you is made up of MANY baby steps. Before you can feel comfortable about flirting (letting someone know you like them) you must feel comfortable about yourself. If you know that you are worthwhile, productive, valuable, and loveable, you won't have any trouble flirting. Building your self esteem is the step that needs to be taken. If you don't love yourself, how can you expect anyone else to? Take care.

I don't know if this man is interested in me. But the thing is we both cannot keep eye contacts when talking. But I like him though. What do you advice?

Thanks and best regards,

Alison

Continue practicing looking in his eyes. If the two of you are so uncomfortable looking at each other, you aren't ready to go any further.

I'm a university student and I've known this girl I know for about a year now. We lived in residence last year together. When we left residence and went home for the summer, I realized that there was something more than the friendship we had. At least in my eyes. The distance over the summer made me realize how much of a special girl she is to me. I really care for her a lot! I have a sense that we have been flirting a lot since we've got back to school again. But I'm not sure. Here is an example: I got a message from her the other night saying how she wanted to know what I was doing for the evening. She said she was "lonely" and that she wanted to know if I wanted to watch TV together. She also made it clear that her roomates weren't home. I went, but nothing really serious happened. But it was fun. We've talked a lot and our friendship is SO strong. I don't want to hurt it. The other thing is that she accepted my invitation to my house for Thanksgiving. So she's coming home with me.

Should I take any of this as signs? I'm pretty slow when it comes to female thoughts and how they are feeling. I have NO idea. People are definitely noticing things....I just don't know how SHE feels. Can you give me some ideas about how she might feel or what I should do?

James

I don't know how she feels. Actually, only she knows that. Why don't you ask her?

.

My husband died 3 years ago. To make a long story short, I have been involved with a man whose wife (of 30 years) has the same type of cancer my husband did. Jack doesn't love his wife, she's moody and depressed all the time. He is totally miserable. We travel together, and have "quality time". He can afford to travel whenever he wants and gives me beautiful gifts. I know this sounds harsh, but I really wish she would die. I mean he really loves me, he asked me to marry him, and of course I said yes. What can I do to make him leave his wife?

Sue

First, anyone who is married and asks someone else if they would marry them is looking to have their ego pumped. They have nothing to lose, and chances are they are USING you. Sue, from what you've told me, you want to believe he really loves you, BUT actions speak louder than words. From what you've told me, I think he's using you. I would like to see you with someone who is AVAILABLE.